I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
they need to just BURY HIM!
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
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