I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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