don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
