it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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