just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
