I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Randomize
