I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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