i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
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