Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
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