So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
