ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
