the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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