you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
