I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize