GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
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