peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
