Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
