In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
how drunk are you?
Several
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Randomize
