I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize