were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Randomize
