Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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