I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
