we have pet lesbian snakes
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
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