READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
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