garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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