Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
