they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
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