I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
