Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
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