Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
