I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
