I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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