There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize
