So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Sponge bath it is.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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