Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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