I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Randomize
