I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
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