I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Randomize
