yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
