It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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