I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Randomize
