he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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