I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I didn't notice because vodka
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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