That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
