It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize