im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
