The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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