I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
