she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
you made out with another girl for some wings
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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