the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
