Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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