Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
