First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
